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Feb 13, 2021

Hope the better things in 2021

What should we expect for 2021? Well, my guess is everything will start to feel a bit more normal—especially as the vaccine continues to roll out. But I’m not in control of the world, so how would I know for sure? I am not in control of the world, however I am in control of myself… and you are in control of yourself. So even though we can’t control everything around us, we can control some things. At the very least, we can control how we interact with the world around us. And many times, that makes all the difference. To that end, in an effort to make 2021 a better year for everyone, here are 12 decisions we can all make as the new year begins: 1. Smile more. I think we all miss seeing smiles in public spaces. Once the masks are off, decide to show more of those pearly whites every chance you get. 2. Complain less. 2020 was a year of dealing with life-and-death issues on an almost daily basis. In some ways, all the things we used to complain about seem so small now. So let’s decide to no longer complain about the small stuff. 3. Appreciate more. I thought 2020 would be the year I got everything I wanted. Now I know 2020 was the year to appreciate everything I have. Decide now to carry that forward into 2021 and appreciate all the good around us in a more intentional way. 4. Connect more. In 2020, we lost the ability to connect with others in-person—at coffee shops, churches, restaurants, concerts, sporting events, and even some family gatherings. Let’s never overlook the opportunity to connect with others again. 5. Own less. When everything is taken away, we see what is most important. When it comes to recognizing what activities contribute to quality of life, accumulating physical stuff pales in comparison to the actual life-giving pursuits we are being forced to go without. Decide now to own less in 2021. 6. Encourage more. 2020 was a hard year for everyone! And all of us needed encouragement from time-to-time. Let’s give it freely in 2021—whether people ask for it or not. 7. Waste less. Seems like we all learned the value of another day and another opportunity—because too many had their last one taken from them in 2020. Let’s decide now to not waste any day, any moment, or any amount of energy remaining. 8. Thank more. Decide now to say “thank you” more often. You will be blessed, and the recipient will be blessed. Win-win. 9. Compete less. One thing is for sure—we’re all in this world together. As a result, it’s too easy to see the world as competition against one another. Instead, let’s remember we’re on the same team, all trying to be the best versions of ourselves. If you want to compete, compete against who you were yesterday rather than the stranger down the street. 10. Understand more. Not only was 2020 marked with a global pandemic and economic downturn, in many parts of the world (including my own) it was a year of political strife and division where a difference in opinion was often regarded as a difference in principle. It rarely is. Everyone will benefit—both sides—if we decide now to argue less and understand more. 11. Save more. With the overnight shutdown/collapse of many businesses and a worldwide economy, 2020 showed the importance of having some financial savings in reserve. If you haven’t made saving a priority, decide to do it now. Here are some helpful steps to get there. 12. Love more. Love your spouse. Love your kids. Love your friends. Love your co-workers. Love your neighbor. Love. The world needs more of it. What does 2021 hold? I have no idea. But with these 12 decisions as my resolutions for 2020, I’m ready for just about anything. Because life is more than the circumstances surrounding me.
source and thanks to : https://www.becomingminimalist.com/make-2021-better/

Dec 17, 2018

Kangen Kalian

hallo teman2 Blogger saya buka kembali hobby lama ngeblog ini, silahkan abaikan tulisan blog saya dalam bahasa Inggris hasil kerja sama dengan teman2 lama. Saya mencoba membuka kesempatan baru untuk berbagi dengan kalian setelah saya tidak jomblo lagi, mudah2an bermanfaat salam

Oct 9, 2010

Victim Blaming and Relationship Abuse


One of the Center’s main goals is to eliminate barriers and increase survivors’ access to safety, resources and support. Victim-blaming attitudes are one of these barriers and place survivors in greater danger.
First of All, Where Does It Come From?

One reason people blame a victim is to distance themselves from an unpleasant occurrence and thereby confirm their own invulnerability to the risk. By labeling or accusing the victim, others can see her as different from themselves. People reassure themselves by thinking, "Because I am not like her, because I do not do that, this would never happen to me."
Why Is It Dangerous?

Victim-blaming attitudes only work to marginalize the victim and make it harder for her to come forward and report the abuse. If she knows that you or society blames her for the abuse, she will not feel safe or comfortable coming forward and talking to you.

Victim-blaming attitudes also reinforce what her abuser has been saying all along; that it is her fault this is happening to her. It is NOT her fault or her responsibility to fix the situation; it is the abuser’s choice. By engaging in victim-blaming attitudes, society allows the abuser to perpetrate violence against his partner while avoiding accountability for his actions.
What Does Victim-Blaming Look Like?
Example of Victim-Blaming Attitude: “There are possibilities for a happy relationship if both parties are willing to change.”

Reality: This statement assumes that the victim is equally to blame for the abuse, when in reality, abuse is a conscious choice made by the abuser. Abusers have a choice in how they react to their partner’s actions. Options beside abuse include: walking away, talking in the moment, respectfully explaining why an action is frustrating, breaking up, etc.

Additionally, abuse is not about individual actions that incite the abuser to hurt his partner, but rather about the abuser’s feelings of entitlement and desire to control his partner.

When friends and family remain neutral about the abuse and say that both people need to change, they are colluding with and supporting the abusive partner and making it less likely that the survivor will seek support.
What Can I Do About It?

* Challenge victim-blaming statements when you hear them
* Do not agree with abusers’ excuses for why they abuse
* Let survivors know that it is not their fault
* Hold abusers accountable for their actions: do not let them make excuses like blaming the victim, alcohol, or drugs for their behavior
* Acknowledge that the survivor is her own best expert and provide her with resources and support

Remember if you are aware of abusive behavior and do not speak out against it, your silence communicates implicitly that you see nothing unacceptable taking place.

Apr 9, 2010

Eagle


Eagle is a type of poultry that have the longest life of the world. Can reach 70 years old. But to achieve the age long as it is an eagle must make a decision that is very heavy at that age to 40.

When 40-year-old eagle, paws getting old, long and curved beak into until it almost touched his chest. The wings are so heavy because of his fur has grown dense and thick, so it is very difficult time flying. At that time, eagles have only two choices: Waiting for death, or experiencing a very painful process of transformation - a transformation process over 150 days long.
To perform the transformation, the eagle must strive to fly above the mountain peaks to the edge of the abyss and then make a nest, stopped and stayed there during the transformation process underway.

First of all, the eagle must breaking beak on the rock until the part is separated from his mouth, then grows quiet for a while waiting for a new beak. With the new beak to grow it, he had to pull out one by one his claws and when the new claw has grown, he will pluck his body one by one. A long and painful process. Five months later, the eagle feathers that had grow new. Start eagle can fly again. With the new beak and claws, the hawk began to undergo 30 years of her new life with full of energy?

In this our life, sometimes we also need to make a tough decision to initiate any process of renewal. We must be brave and willing to throw away all the old habit of binding, although old habits it is something fun.

We must be willing to leave the old behavior so that we can start flying again reaching for a better purpose in the future. Only when we are willing to let go of old baggage, open to learning new things, we've just had an opportunity to develop our latent abilities, hone new skills and face the future with confidence.

The biggest obstacle to change lies within yourself and you are the ruler over yourself. Do not let the past dulled our spirits up and wither.

You are the hawk-eagle.

Change must happen. Thus, we must change for the better from now!

Decision


Inspiration from the daily routines that involve the accuracy of the decision to write a few tips that if little-a lot of help to remind the concerned personnel. especially for routine or urgent situation faced with a situation that requires us to make decisions. Decision making can not be done carelessly, because our decision today will affect our lives in the future.

Deciding what is important is not an easy thing. Moreover, if the decision is a decision that determines the motion of the company's business. You need a long time to take the best decision. Quite often you hit "dizziness headache" because when I was thinking, you're forced to make decisions quickly.

To you who are thinking of taking a decision, try deh following quick tips:

1. Do not be afraid to make decisions. Some people are afraid of making decisions. Consequently it is not we who make decisions but keadaanlah that gives us a decision.

2. Do not make decisions emotionally, but please use consideration. Thus we are able to think rationally and calculate plus minus of every decision that we wish to take.

3. To produce quick decisions, you should not delay because the decision could not only through the process of a single night. Keep an eye on any developments that might change your decision at any time.

4. Use a sharp analysis in data processing that has been painstakingly you collect. Take the wisest decision and have the smallest risk. You also still need to supervise the implementation of those decisions one after another.

5. Make sure you know the last limit (deadline), when decisions had to be determined. After that set deadlines for yourself, when you have a decision has been made. Record the date you set as the limit deadline.

6. Please specify clearly the criteria or qualifications that you have to take decisions. For example the decision must be profitable and the company's employees or the decision is not burdensome for all concerned.

7. Gather information and important data that affects the decision. Because who knows the information is required for materials argumentation. Do not forget to set a time limit information gathering.

8. Make your decision from several alternative data and information already collected. Learn and consider the value or weight of each of these alternatives, which are the most fitting and appropriate.

9. Do not even apply subjective in making decisions. This means do not choose your favorable decision or a group of people alone.

10. When you have studied and carefully consider alternatives such decision, do not hesitate to determine the best decision from which there are several alternative decisions. Remember, hesitation will only make decisions that you take "raw" return.

11. Announce decisions you make in a timely manner and have been determined. In announcing this decision make sure that your data is supported by a strong, accurate and relevant. If you need time disclose, say that this decision was made on the consideration and mature and rational thinking.

12. Do not be afraid to expose your arguments, if any party who objected. Do not complain or protest from the recipient makes you think the decision to change the decision you've made.

13. In making decisions, you choose from several alternatives, rather than choose which one or which one is correct. So, there is no right or wrong decision. But the decisions could be result does not match what we expect. So, you do not have to regret that decision has been taken. What else is fixated on a protracted regret when the decision you took was not producing the results we expect.

14. After taking a decision, whatever the outcome, you must monitor and hold, and focus your efforts to make the best of what was decided. You can also make various adjustments so the results can be directed to the achievement of those objectives together.

15. In a quick decision, as far as possible involve the people associated with the decision taken. By involving them, you can get valuable feedback, in addition, you can invite their commitment to support the decisions that have been taken. All you can do, among others, are asking their opinions and suggestions. This information could be a reference to a decision.

Now, if the decision was unanimous, lest you pollute the consequences of the decision-making decisions that have been set together. Good decision!